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Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Deconstructing ‘World’s Friendliest People’

A wedding in the Indian state of Rajasthan in 2009. Would an invitation have helped the country's contention for Keith Bedford for The New York Times A wedding in the Indian state of Rajasthan in 2009. Would an invitation have helped the country’s contention for “most friendly”

Which country has the world’s friendliest people

It’s a preposterous question for many reasons. Yet writers, guidebooks and travelers can’t seem to stop asking it. Admit it, you’ve returned from a place and declared to your friends that its people have got to be the friendliest (or nicest! or most wonderful!) people on the planet. I cerainly have.

But today I declare I never will again, and I ask you to join me.

It’s not because such judgments are wild generalizations of culturally complex places, nor because most travelers (including me) have been too few of the world’s countries to speak authoritatively. Those are valid points, but I think we all know this is cocktail party patter, not rigorous academic research.

It’s because I find the question imprecise and unhelpful. What does “friendliest” even mean

I’d like to suggest a “taxonomy of friendliness,” to help us all be more specific when we return from vacation and declare how wonderful the world is.

To tease out the elements of niceness, I asked the dreaded question one last time on Twitter last week, but insisted that people specify what made their country of choice so friendly. The answers flooded in: the Japanese will go out of their way to help visitors, Estonians are kindhearted people eager to share their rich history, Filipin! os are always smiling and will help anyone no matter their own situation. There was more: the Lebanese are always happy to see tourists, the Irish have some of the best storytellers in the world, and you never know when a Georgian (as in the Republic of) will invite you to a feast.

So here, with the help of Twitter, input from colleagues and my own personal experiences, is an initial proposal - admittedly still unscientific â€" for Kingdoms within the domain of Friendliness, and what countries (and cities and regions) might be contenders for each crown.

1) Most Hospitable. That is, those countries where you can’t smile at someone without getting invited to have a drink or share a meal. The Greeks and Turks are my obvious choices, but from others’ input it looks as if  there’s a hospitality crescent reaching around the Middle East and into North Africa. (It helps if you like tea.) Any country where strangers stand a fighting chance of scring an invite to a wedding â€" hello, India â€" gets a nomination as well.

2) Most Welcoming. A related category, but more general: nationalities that may not necessarily slaughter a pig for you or insist you stay in their house  free, but who are just simply kind, laid back, pleasant people who are happy to see you. Frequently mentioned candidates: Australia, New Zealand, Fiji, Tahiti and Canadian Newfoundland, raising the possibility that island living is an influence.

3) Most Helpful. My Twitter feed was filled with stories of locals going out of their way, often literally, to help lost travelers: giving rides (Indonesia), holding their hand as they walked them to their destination (Ireland), shutting down their shop to accompany them through the city (Japan). My vote goes to China, where people upended their day to help hapless old me with notable frequency. Blogger Matt Kepnes, a k a Nomadic Matt, made the good ! point tha! t special credit goes to those who are patient with travelers who don’t speak their language and go out of their way to communicate; he cited Japan and Cambodia, among others.

4) Most Positive. Not as in “They have so little, and yet they’re so happy!” - that’s at best a cliché and at worst condescending. I’m talking about countries where across the income spectrum people seem to instinctually and contagiously smile their way through the day. The Caribbean region as a whole is my nominee, but many wrote in to declare that Thailand’s smile-per-capita rate was sky-high. My limited trips to sub-Saharan Africa makes me think those who know the continent better than I will dispute those choices. I can categorically disqualify my home city of Boston â€" not that New England pessimism doesn’t have its charms.

5) Warmest. Not quite the same as most positive - instead of smiling constantly, people in these places make you smile constantly and laugh frequntly. They love to talk and are good conversationalists, but avoid talking about their problems. I nominate the Brazilians; it’s one of the reasons I lived there for two years and return frequently. Pauline Frommer, the guidebook creator and radio host, who suggested the category, also included Brazilians, adding the Irish and Italians.

6) Most Fun. If you had to share a vacation rental with a house full of X, what nationality would X be I’m tempted to nominate the Finns, simply because they’re into co-ed naked saunas. Ireland and Scotland won raves on Twitter, but if fun for you is inseparable from music and dancing, I’d consider adding Cubans and their neighbors, the Dominicans, to your beach home fantasy.

7) Most Genuinely Interested in Meeting Outsiders. After all, we’re not talking about how people treat their spouses, or their country’s poor, or whether they back-stab their best friends. We’re talking about how travelers are treated. S! o where a! re people interested in meeting tourists, even if only for curiosity’s sake In my experience, this tends to happen in places that don’t get as many visitors as their neighbors, so let’s rule out (despite their considerable other charms) Parisians and Venetians, and choose Colombia over Peru and the Midwest over New York City.

Disagree with me or my sources Of course you do! So add your comments: without using the words “friendly” or “nice,” who are the most hospitable, welcoming, helpful, smiley, warmest, most fun, most-genuinely-interested-in-meeting-outsiders people in the world And what categories are missing Let the love-fest toward humanity begin.

Next week: the meanest people in the world. (Just kidding.)



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